Yesterday is…

When you open your eyes in the morning, you don’t realise that you have no idea as how the next 24hrs will be. You plan, you decide, you expect how it should be or how it’s going to be, but, you don’t know how it will turn out to be. You can mark your daily schedules, plan meetings and make arrangements and still you can’t tell how it will be panning out. 

Some months ago, I wasn’t standing where I am now, never thought I might make it till yesterday and yet, I have. It’s not a day to day point of living like most normally think or talk about. You read about it somewhere, come across so many instances and you think, may be she could have done it different, she doesn’t have it tough enough to be thinking it’s all doom and gloom, but, just hear me out. She does have it tough. She always knew she had it tough. She just couldn’t handle the things when they were getting tough. You just didn’t know about it.

You bend, you mould, you adjust, you pick up and then you go on. My yesterday if anything to go by, was a pleasant change: it changed what I knew I was capable of, it changed what I am aware of and also what else it can be like.  I am wondering if this is how I changed all my yesterdays,  all of those difficult and not so difficult ones. I am not saying no one helped me but I stood by me too.

It’s ok if it’s not all colourful or exciting like the carnival nights at night. It’s also ok if it’s not sparking like the tiny bubbles in the champange glass or the fresh dewy morning of the day. For me, right now It’s like the small but ever blinking million stars in the sky. Some days it glows and blinks, some days it hides under the clouds. But, it still is there, ever present. That’s my kind of strength.

That’s been here all along, it was there yesterday too. I just walked on not knowing I had it. I am not sure if I picked it up or it picked me up, but, knowing I have it makes me realise that the next 24hrs can be anything it can be, I am ok for it. I will not be afraid to plan or hope about it, I will not feel sad that I wasn’t sure about it, I will just be. 

Like the leaves of yesterday that whither and fall away, let any doubts fall away. There is always a new day, a new leaf, a new start. Let yesterday be just that, yesterday. We still have today and tomorrow. 


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